When we're with other people, romantically and intimately, when feelings become involved and sincere, the worst thing is to be hurt. And when the hurt is repeated, the thought of doing it once again, hurts even more. I guess that's how the above post came about.
She's one of my favorite writers and a dear friend though we haven't seen each other in years, but, eh, we keep in touch a la social media and our deep desire to be writers forever who lounge in cardigans with frumpy clothing as we get lost in our worlds. We just want to write and be happy while doing so.
But, we also both want and desire for a relationship that makes us cry because it's just that damn thorough. Not one that makes us cry because we're left so empty wanting the fullness what was promised versus what was actually delivered.
One of life's sweetest gifts to us while venturing this Earth are relationships. And don't roll your eyes either - you know it's true. Relationships, companionship, and the love that eventually grows are some of life's beauties. Relationships are absolute beautiful beings when they work. They're the best things since sliced bread, since mind blowing, toe curling, breathtaking sex, since good music - take your pick - when the people functioning in and out of it, work and function together.
But this is life, so we know more times than not, we not only hear the war stories of the heartbroken guy whose former love of his life is forever known as "The Whore" or the bitter gal who's convinced forever more that all men "Ain't Shit", but we're too sitting on the frontline, armored from head to toe, fighting this ongoing battle for love.
It's not true that all good girls like bad boys. Just like it isn't true that all men want the video vixen resembling wife. A lot of us, whether we want to admit it or not, are OK with the everyday around the way girl or guy *que the LL Cool J classic*. But just because you're from around the way doesn't mean you have to conduct yourself as such. Right?
There's a million wrong ways to seek and find what we want out of a potential partner, a possible boo, a probable life partner. But, there aren't too many right ways to do it either. Just rolling with it is how we eventually handle the search.
But the search, sometimes, is daunting.
Usually, in the end, it all works out. It all pans out the way we've wanted it to be all along - so long as we allow ourselves and those who we deal with, to be their natural selves while we push and advocate for them to be their best selves.
So the next time we venture out in search for the best missing link to ourselves, remember that if we want the good guy (or the good girl), we have to give them something to be good for. Just remember: originality goes farther than creating something that doesn't exist.